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- Alexander -
21 August 2014 @ 03:04 pm

Wow. JUST WOW.
the difference 5 years makes... :)

August 22nd, 2009

happy guy

[protected post] 25...

There was much that I was feeling yesterday, aside from the migrane crap... I was feeling lucky, and overwhelmed.
This is a place that I never ever suspected that I would get to.
I'm not sure anyone else knows the feeling of blank future. Where no matter how hard I try, I couldn't picture a future that was good enough for me...

My mom told me a story once, of a woman who went to the fortune teller/psychic, and the psychic was unable to see her future... she couldn't get a reading. It was on her way home from that appointment that she was killed in a car accident...

I believe that the reason there was no future for so long, was simply because it wasn't going to be.
I never imagined 25 would ever come and go, and now that it has, i feel so lucky to be where I am.
Granted it's not where I wanted to be either, but I feel as though everything that happens here on out is free time... extra time...

I make plans, and I look forward to things, but four years ago, today never would have been possible...

Karen is sure to tell me every chance she gets that the cards change as we make choices. that every time I decide to get up in the morning and wear shorts instead of pants, or vice versa, I have altered my 'future' just a little bit... It's crazy to think how everything we do... changes everything... the butterfly effect....

I am lucky enough to be able to see the way things have played out in my life, and how different roads would have lead in completely different paths, and I'm grateful for every last one of them... the people in my life, are meant to be in my life, and all have a special place, and responsibility.

So in the next couple of years, I'm going to focus on getting myself in a place where I can accomplish the things I want to accomplish